It's smokin', baby

I'll start by showing you this. Click play to watch.

Whilst I was busy for 2 minutes having fun with the kids, this happened.

A word of advice. Do not try to "fast forward" the rise on bread dough by placing it on a hot ceramic hob. If you do, stay close to it and switch it off after a moment! Never leave it switched on with the loaf tin on top and get distracted for just a second as you will see smoke billowing from your cooker and have to salvage it like this.

To make something like this.

My beautiful bread was rising with a tasty mix of seeds and oats as a topping. As I ripped the dough off the smoking mess, some of my new bread rolls were sprinkled with the aforementioned topping. Interesting! Note how ununiform the shapes are. It kills me to show you this.

I'm grateful to this extractor fan on high.

And these kitchen bi-folds fully open.

I am not impressed that there's no bread in the house. I am impressed that the fug of smoke lifted and there is no residual smell. Thanks fan and doors :o)

Pah! Who needs homemade bread anyway.

One saving grace? I made perfect melt in the mouth meatballs tonight. I'll share that with you another day.

Oh, and I've got bronchitis. So does Ella. I knew there was something not quite right.